The Dirty Cheerleader’s Perfect Cheer

It was the first start of the year for Drew Pomeranz as he hosted the Baltimore Orioles and he gave owners everything they wanted with a line of 6.0 IP, 1 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BBs, 6 Ks. The Ks were there, the win intact, low WHIP, and oh why not, a Quality Start for those that needed it. Now, I’ve been a little uneasy putting a ton of faith into The Dirty Cheerleader after what happened in the second half of 2016 – his Curveball lost movement, he threw the most innings he’s every thrown in his career, and his elbow wasn’t all too hot. With this solid outing under his belt against the fearsome Orioles, does this mean that a major bump is coming for Pomeranz? A bit, yes. The pitcher we saw today deserves to be out of the doghouse that is the 80s and at the very least the 70s around the likes of Ivan Nova, Led Zeppelin, and Ian Kennedy, if not higher. I’m not sold that the walks are gone and that he’ll be able to last to the sixth often, but I’m encouraged and obviously worth a roster spot in all 12-teamers.

Let’s see how every other SP did yesterday:

Matthew Boyd – 6.0 IP, 0 ER, 1 Hits, 2 BBs, 6 Ks. Holy Wade Boggs’ Mustache, I wasn’t expecting Boyd to have arguably the best outing of the day. I’m still going to be Boyd Watching though as I can’t trust he’ll be able to do this against a team not named the Twins.

Carlos Carrasco – 7.0 IP, 1 ER, 4 Hits, 0 BBs, 7 Ks. Aces gonna ace. Sure it was the White Sox, but it’s great seeing Carrasco take advantage and get the job done.

Robbie Ray – 6.2 IP, 0 ER, 4 Hits, 5 BBs, 8 Ks. High WHIP? Check. Good amount of strikeouts? Check. I’m not sure how he managed to leave this start unscathed in the ER department, but otherwise I think this fits the Ray bill alright.

Cole Hamels – 7.0 IP, 1 ER, 4 Hits, 4 BBs, 5 Ks. Ughhhh Hamels, if you want me to stop dropping you in the rankings, you’ll have to stop walking a ton of batters. This is getting silly.

Gio Gonzalez – 7.0 IP, 1 ER, 6 Hits, 0 BBs, 6 Ks. I see you Gio. I also see your history of inconsistency, but I’ll be watching closely now. Very closely… *Whips out giant binoculars that totally fit in my pocket*

Jered Weaver – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 3 Hits, 0 BBs, 5 Ks. Whenever you feel like the odds are against you, life is pulling you down and you just don’t think you can make it through, remember tonight. Remember the night that Jered freakin’ Weaver had this start in Coors. 

James Shields – 5.1 IP, 1 ER, 2 Hits, 2 BBs, 6 Ks. Should I start something between Weaver and Shields? I feel like that would be Shields’ to lose, which would mean he would at least win something this year.

Hector Santiago – 6.1 IP, 2 ER, 3 Hits, 1 BBs, 1 Ks. Maybe Hector too? And Nolasco for good measure. It will be a party like it’s 1999.

Antonio Senzatela – 7.0 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BBs, 5 Ks. Senz-A pulled off another one, but this time it was against the Padres, albeit at home. I know he’s going to get picked up a bunch, I won’t be one of them. I just don’t trust the stuff + Coors factor.

Jameson Taillon – 6.0 IP, 2 ER, 4 Hits, 1 BBs, 4 Ks. I was hoping for a little better against the Reds, but I’ll take it. Taillon, you’re a stud and don’t let anyone else tell you otherwise.

Matt Harvey – 5.2 IP, 2 ER, 5 Hits, 1 BBs, 6 Ks. Harvey was looking pretty dang solid…until he strained his hamstring and left the game. Oh, that is richer than having a McDonald’s in your basement.

Jeff Samardzija – 6.2 IP, 3 ER, 5 Hits, 4 BBs, 7 Ks. This is like the most Samardzija start ever. He’s en route to 200 innings of destroying your team with a 1.30+ WHIP and 3.80+ ERA. But 200 innings! I’d rather have a 4.00 ERA of 100 innings than 3.80 at 200. At least that gives me more room to make up for the damage done.

Dan Straily – 5.0 IP, 2 ER, 3 Hits, 2 BBs, 5 Ks. Oh, so it’s going to be like that, huh? NOT ON MY WATCH. What does that even mean? It means that Straily is a bum, my son.

Wily Peralta – 6.0 IP, 3 ER, 5 Hits, 4 BBs, 7 Ks. I have to say, I’ve been kinda impressed with Peralta. He had a solid 10 game stretch to end 2016 and now he’s had 12 strikeouts across two starts against the Rockies and Jays. I’m not saying he’s worth a look in 12-teamers (we’re not even into the round-table discussion about the stage of falling backwards into your arms yet), but those in deep leagues desperate for an arm could do worse.

Rookie Davis – 4.0 IP, 1 ER, 2 Hits, 4 BBs, 3 Ks. Yeah, Davis is a Cup of Schmo alright.

Dylan Bundy – 6.1 IP, 2 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 3 Ks. Ehhhh I was cautious starting Bundy here as he faced the Sawx, but seeing that he didn’t implode makes me feel a bit confident in Dylan moving forward. Well, kinda. Now he gets the Jays again…then the Sawx again…AL BEAST YOU ARE THE WORST.

Joe Musgrove – 5.1 IP, 3 ER, 7 Hits, 1 BBs, 2 Ks. I’ve had higher hopes for Musgrove this season, though it would be naive to skip over the fact that he’s faced the Mariners twice, which boasts a pretty solid offense. His next three starts are the Angels, Rays, A’s, and I expect a good amount of people talking about Joey by then.

Ariel Miranda – 5.2 IP, 4 ER, 7 Hits, 2 BBs, 5 Ks. I don’t want to be part of this world.

J.A. Happ – 4.2 IP, 4 ER, 9 Hits, 0 BBs, 8 Ks. Two starts down, two ridiculous high K totals with poor ER to show for it. This is the completely opposite of what I expected from Happ this year and I have no idea what to do. Okay that’s a lie, I’m not touching him. If he has a lower ER total, the Ks will drop too, but it’s feasible for the ER to stay afloat and the strikeout total drop as well. So what you’re saying is that he will have plenty fewer strikeouts moving forward? Yes. That’s exactly what I’m saying.

Lance Lynn – 5.0 IP, 4 ER, 5 Hits, 4 BBs, 4 Ks. You’re killing me Lynn. I know it was the Nats and I generally hate streaming against them, but it was you! Alright Frankie, put up another L…Streaming Record: 3-4. At least you guys will agree with my drop of Lynn on Monday now…?

Tyler Skaggs – 5.0 IP, 5 ER, 8 Hits, 2 BBs, 5 Ks. Blegh. I know some are believing Skaggs can put it together and I do think his stuff is better than the pitchers he’s getting lumped in with, but until we see some sort of consistency, you really should have nothing to do with him.

Bartolo Colon – 3.1 IP, 6 ER, 6 Hits, 2 BBs, 2 Ks. The Giant Peach just isn’t the same as he used to be. Then again, he had plenty of starts like this last year soooo let’s move on.

Clay Buchholz – 2.1 IP, 6 ER, 8 Hits, 1 BBs, 2 Ks. Bucky is the movie that keeps coming out and you wonder “Are people actually investing in this?” Bucky 7: Cult of Bucky.

Today’s Streamer

Andrew Triggs vs. Kansas City Royals – I think Triggs has it in him to give you a good outing against the weak Royals offense.

Tomorrow’s Streamer

Eduardo Rodriguez vs. Pittsburgh Pirates – Do I like trusting Edu after he’s shown that he has some kinks to work out? Sure don’t. But Andriese/Vargas/Chen aren’t all-too appealing either.

Day After Tomorrow’s Streamer

CC Sabathia vs. St. Louis Cardinals – Am I really picking CC? I don’t trust Norris against the Indians, Folty is having his start pushed back, Anderson hasn’t looked in any way trustable, leaving CC or Conley. I often have a bad feeling streaming the same pitcher twice against the same team, which means me default to CC. Shudders. Half point please.

Game of the Day

Zack Wheeler vs. Vince Velasquez – I want to see Velasquez look good with his secondary pitches, and I want to see Wheeler look good with any of his pitches.