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The List

Vibe Check: Canseco Vibes

Allow José Canseco to show you the future of vibes.

Ben Ellenberg
We Love Baseball 5/30/2021

Hello! Welcome to Vibe Check, a weekly roundup article where we just sit back, take a deep breath, maybe brew a cup of tea (sweet if you have it) and just kind of take the temperature on what’s going on around Major League Baseball. So stretch out, light some incense, and let’s check the vibes.  

It’s Memorial Day Weekend! For most people, that means parades, cookouts, Chevy Sales Events, and a day off on Monday. For me, it means one important thing: Mr. 40/40 himself, one half of the Bash Brothers, José Canseco. Why does Memorial Day Weekend make me think of José Canseco? To be honest, it’s because I’m always thinking of José Canseco – more specifically his Twitter account. For the uninitiated, it’s a trip. 

So for this Memorial Day, we’re going to do things a little differently. I’ll be comparing the vibes of various plays and happenings around the league to their corresponding tweet from José Canseco. You see, Canseco routinely gazes into the future. 

However, by his own admission, those true memories can be a little faulty. 

Like the time he spoiled the plot of Kong Vs. Godzilla back in 2019 but was a little fuzzy on the third act details. 

All the same, as a soothsayer and gazer into the abyss of the future, we can safely assume that every tweet referenced from Mr. 40/40 will in fact be a comment on an event from this week in baseball, no matter when the tweet is from. We’re going to read his Twitter account like a Rosetta Stone of vibes. You’ll catch on. Let’s get into it. 

 

 

Extraterrestrial Vibes 

Fernando Tatís Jr. Is An Alien

 

 

 

Hey everyone, I think Fernando Tatís Jr. is an alien. 

And also officially the vibiest dude in the league.

 

No Clothes, Just Vibes

 

The Dumbest Play Ever

On Thursday, we witnessed the dumbest play in baseball. 

All that First Baseman Will Craig had to do was step on first and none of this would have happened. Instead, he aggressively did not do that. It’s a classic Benny Hill Theme moment and will make blooper reels for years to come. But had we considered the galaxy-wide effects of a play like this? I’ll tell you one person who did. 

This play by the Pirates kept us out of the Galactic League for at least another year and probably keeps Pittsburgh out exclusively for another decade. 

 

Supernatural Vibes 

The Devil Went Down To Tampa

 

 

Lord of the Ocean

 

And that’s all I got this week, folks. Enjoy the weekend, and remember:

https://twitter.com/JoseCanseco/status/1398507859936088064?s=20

Ben Ellenberg

Ben lives in Los Angeles and is almost always thinking about Tony Gwynn stuff.

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